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Writer's pictureElf Lyons

Elf News 2 - Radio bits n bobs and more.


Good morning,

How are you?

Love Songs to Guinea Pigs - Feb 2019

Well. Here is my news. One result of living in shared rented accommodation is that you are slowly reduced of any actual space to do work and live, the house becomes an organism unto itself. The living room becomes a space predominantly for laundry to fester, the hall is a place where old bikes are kept and the hoover to age, the kitchen is the murder scene of old vegetables and pasta sauce and the bathroom is littered with dead hollow shampoo bottles and the burgeoning love affair of black mold. Because of this, your bed starts to become a symbolic alternative to an entire house. Your room is a collage of areas: keys, wallet, phone are placed in the ‘cherished area’ (i.e the underwear drawer), ‘nice clothes to wear tomorrow’ are folded on the floor, ‘dirty clothes’ are thrown into the naughty corner, books you WILL read at some point are placed under a chair, the books you HAVE to read are under your pillow, next to your laptop, so you don’t forget to send that invoice. The medication you need to take is chucked onto the bed like a Tracy Emin artwork and somewhere within all this are random 1 and 2p coins, hair ties, old fountain pens and a postcard. Last night I woke up to realise I was hugging a pair of jeans and a packet of multivitamins. Next to my head was a candle I wasn't aware I owned. Sometimes I wonder if I am being haunted by the ghost of Guy Pearce in Memento, and it will all come back to me suddenly that I’ve murdered someone and left clues in my room as to how and why. Currently the only place that has any order in my house is the guinea pig cage. Though I did find my copy of David Sedaris’s Calypso in there yesterday (nibbled) so god knows how tired I actually was when I finished working. Maybe I am too tired to notice that my guinea pigs can actually read. Anyway. SOME NEWS SHOWS Thank you SO much to those of you who came to see Love Songs to Guinea Pigs at Vault Festival. It was such a treat to be apart of it and it was SO cool to sell out so soon in advance. . Love Songs to Guinea Pigs is going to return later in the year - more details to follow.

(If you would like me to SEND YOU ONE OF OUR LIMITED POSTERS OF LOVE SONGS TO GUINEA PIGS WITH GENEVIEVE'S BEAUTIFUL ILLUSTRATION ON IT - please donate to my ko-fi page. )

Tickets for CHIFFCHAFF at the end of March are selling fast so do book now if you have not. It is part of the queer '96 Festival’ at the Omnibus Theatre in Clapham. Dates are 25th - 30th of March.

RADIO Was thrilled to be a guest on BBC’s Grownupland podcast earlier this month talking about 'Chilling Out'. Have a listen to me wax lyrical about guinea pigs. On Saturday 2nd March at 6.15pm I am on Clive Anderson’s BBC Radio show ‘Loose Ends’. Again, please listen, because the other guests are really cool. ARTICLES I’ve contributed to the following two independent publications, the first is REAL REVIEW where I have written about Austerity without any hint of comedy.

(I went to the launch party last night at the ICA and everyone was an architect and wore black. So as you can tell, this is unlike my usual work.)

Second is for the INDEPENDENT COMEDY APPRECIATION SOCIETY MAGAZINE. It is a beautiful creation with lovely illustrations and all the articles are unique and vibrant. I have written about my love affair with comedy.

These magazine are self funded and only exist and continue to do so if you buy them, so please, help support these artists who are creating something different.

If you haven't read about my awful Valentines day experience in the February 14th copy of The Guardian in their segment 'My Funny Valentine', you can here. WORKSHOPS

Thrilled to say that my March Intensive workshop at the Rosemary Branch Theatre in association with Unattended Items sold out a long while ago, but fantastic news, I AM DOING A NEW ONE IN MAY 2019 The dates will be the 5th, 12th, 19th, 26th of May with a showcase in the evening of the 26th. Cost for the course is £270. If you would like to reserve your space, please email apply with details of who you are to info@theelflyons.com. ****************** PERSONAL RECOMMENDATIONS

To understand the inner mind of me currently, I would recommend doing the following:

THEATRE: See Berberian Sound Studio at the Donmar Warehouse if you can. Especially if you’re a lover of sound design, foley and horror. It is exquisite.

FILMS: Watch the 2018 Suspiria and enjoy Thom Yorke's awesome soundscape. MUSIC: Listen to Dead Man’s Bones 2009 album ‘Dead Man’s Bones’. BOOKS: Read ‘The House on Haunted Hill’ by Shirley Jackson SELF CARE: Get a pair of guinea pigs.

****************** And there you have it. Lots of love, Elf xxx

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