Individuals who are blowing me away
I have had a fever for four days now. I can see Dragons on the ceiling. It is a Saturday night. The Sims is taking a really long time to download, and I have eaten all the chocolate. Even though I can't taste it. Thus, it seemed like the perfect time, whilst sweating like a pig in a Sauna, and certain I am having a full fledged breakdown, to write a blog.
Here is a collection of artists who I know who I also love who are blowing my tits off with their awesomeness. All of them are real. My fever hasn't affected me at all. So please, follow and support these artists goddamit.
Anaïs and I met at a modern dance class after I made the mistake of watching 'Fame' and thinking 'I could do that'. Anaïs spoke to me afterwards, I think maybe because she took pity on the fact I dance like someone who has just contracted gout. Unlike me, Anaïs dances like a professional dancer - because that is what she is.
Anyway, besides being poetry in motion, Anaïs is also the creator of NNC Couture. She up-cycles and creates ethical and unique handmade items which each tell their own precious story. It is her own business and she is doing the whole thing from her home in France.
Give her a follow on insta and if you want an item, send her a dm:
@nnc.couture
https://m.facebook.com/nnc.couture/
(And yes, it is in French, but Jesus just do a bit of Duolingo and you'll be fine)
DUFFY
Duffy is an actor, activist and the most patient teacher of all time. Duffy has aided teaching me some integral techniques for my new version of SWAN and if you are looking for an instructor in mime and Visual Vernacular, look no further.
As a performer, he is absolutely hypnotising and captivating. Watch him and fall in love. If you are able to - watch Deafinetly Theatre's production of Sarah Kane's 4.48 online and you will understand what I mean.
He, alongside the team at HEAR ART PROJECT - a non-profit which funds deaf filmmakers to make independent short films - are raising money to make three films by deaf artists. If you can, support this amazing project.
Also - if you are free on the 5th July and the 21st July, come watch Duffy perform at House of Horrors!
KATE PRITCHARD
If you don’t know who Katie Pritchard is - who the hell are you - you silly sausage. It’s bloody Katie Pritchard - one of the NICEST, KINDEST PEOPLE in the whole world, (bar that one time she killed a nice lady called Pat Salad). She is also one of the weirdest and funniest little sausages that exists, (she really knows her way around sulphuric acid and a bottle of bleach). Katie won Musical Comedian last year, got a first in her Music Degree and made a great career in Hull selling meth* before turning to comedy.
She dresses up as a ghost, a spider, a Tardis and at one point dresses up as Joan of Arc and sets fire to herself.
She has to be seen to be believed. She puts the Kate Pritchard in 'Katie Pritchard is Iconic'
You can regularly see her on twitch and at the Phoenix Arts Club in London.
ALSO, she makes silly t-shirts which are fab. Buy one. All the proceeds go to buying more equipment to make meth.
BIG PENIS McGEE
BPM has been one of the best accountants I have ever come across. We originally met on a farm in the South of France back in 2017 after I got really confused enroute to a gig in Hull, but since then we have been together through thick and thin. Literally in most cases as Big Penis McGee is actually capable of walking through walls and has often taken me on some odd adventures - usually to car parks because he thinks the 'foundations aren't as strong as they should be when you consider the total weight of all these ford fiestas in one space'. A fantastic man and I am really excited for him now that he has finished his recent degree in Corporate Finance.
JORDAN GRAY
Jordan Gray is phenomenal. End of. And not JUST because she has recently subscribed to Guinea Pig Magazine. Jordan and I met and subsequently fell in love at Damsel Production’s ‘Damsel in the Bush’ at Bush Hall and now we are going to collaborate and make something. Quite simply, no one can follow her after she has been on. It would be wrong - like Ed Sheeran trying to follow Dolly Parton at Glastonbury. You would feel a part of you die inside. Why follow perfection? She makes the audience combust together in a collective orgasm of anarchy and joy. Watching Jordan is like being Barbarella in the Excessive Machine. See her: https://www.facebook.com/talldarkfriend
ROSIE HOLT
Rosie Holt, alongside being one of the best cage fighters I know who will stop at nothing to win a match, even if it means using her teeth, is one of the few glorious people in the world who knows how to use social media to make the world a happier, gigglier place. She is ‘The Woman’. She satirises and parodies in her words “awful people” which is fab because her characters are AWFUL but Rosie in real life is pretty much Maria from the Sound of Music.
Watch her on Twitter and support her on Ko-Fi:
PAT SALAD
Pat Salad is technically dead, (thank's Katie Pritchard), but she doesn't have to be. Say her name 'Pat Salad' 7 times into a mirror (you can't be looking into it though, it has to be at an angle as she hates vanity) and eventually, at some point, between 3 to 5 business days, she will drop a salad at the bottom of the bed and lay 7 gold boiled eggs in your toilet.
What I love about Pat is she doesn't look how you would imagine her at all.
MR JOHN ROBERTSON
Mr John Robertson may look like an evil viking on first appearances - and that is definitely a role he can play. However, he could also play an Gothic Australian adaptation of Oscar Wilde as well as the inner voice of Lassie if Lassie was perhaps trapped in Hell. John is kind and odd to the core. Watch him on Twitch and try not to die. https://www.thejohnrobertson.com
Anyway - I’m not going to bang on about his show The Dark Room because blah blah blah. BUT he wrote a kids book which he NEVER TALKS ABOUT because he is a turd - but it is absolutely phenomenal and one of the best things I have ever read. A Clive Barker/Terry Pratchett hodgepdge of joy. If I was an 8year old reading The Little Town of Marrowville I would have pulled muscles from laughing too much, but as an adult with limited bladder control, I simply wet myself.
Buy ‘The Little Town of Marrowville’ here: https://www.hive.co.uk/Product/John-Robertson/The-Little-Town-of-Marrowville/23823932
***
Those are my friends. I am going to praise some more tomorrow. The Sims has downloaded now.
Spread the word of the talent of these angels please.
LOVE ELF
*just joking, I am 90% certain it wasn't meth.
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